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I've been working on a project to solve the social connection problem using a new approach. In a post third space society, I want to make it easier for people to connect with others nearby in small groups around shared hobbies and activities. Having a small group size makes it easier to host at someone's place and it's also cheaper than going out.

I did a soft launch earlier this week by posting on NYC subreddits to get early feedback and test out my hypothesis . The reaction has been very positive with many comments saying they like the concept. Obviously there's a long way to go to really nail down the product market fit and build a sustainable business around it but the early feedback makes me feel like there is really something there.


Your project seems very cool and like a great way to tackle the problem. Although between apps similar to yours and dating apps like Tinder, I can’t help but feel a little uneasy that more and more frequently, people only meet by first filtering out dozens or hundreds, if not thousands of other people through an app.

I suppose theoretically it should lead to more connections based on interests and commonalities, as opposed to superficial characteristics (at least in the case your app, going off of your Reddit post; Tinder is a bit of a different story). I do feel like something is lost in the process, though. There are many people who have good friends that they have very little in common with.


Really love your comment about filtering people. It's something I thought a lot about when designing the user experience. A few hypotheses I want to test with my approach are:

1) Swipe based interfaces inherently cause users to see other people as more disposable. I'm trying to have my app be centered around plans, which is a mix between a traditional event with a set time and location and a social media post.

2) Paradox of choice. I'm testing whether providing people with fewer good options will make it easier to commit to something instead of having endless choices.

3) Friend dates are awkward. When people meet through traditional friend making apps, the first meeting is usually dinner, coffee, etc. I think people become pickier when this is the common mode of meeting because if you don't really click at the meeting, it's a waste of time. My theory is that when the meetings are more focused on doing an activity you already like, even if you don't completely click with the group you meet with, it can still be an enjoyable time. I'm hoping this makes people more open to getting out there more.


I've used a website like this a decade / decade and a half ago, and it was pretty great (even despite heavily leaning two generations older than me due to the demographics of that location).


Good vision, but why is it an app? In general "We want to install an app on your phone" is a no from many people unless there's a compelling reason. Not to mention the whole cross platform issue.


Could help me find your reddit posts? I'm interested in learning more, but am having trouble locating them through search...

I share your enthusiasm for making it easier for people to connect in person, focused around shared interests (incl. established online social networks). I'm sincerely concerned about the potential outcomes of our current and growing social isolation.

That said, I believe that "third spaces" are still essential. Effective third spaces can provide safe, neutral ground for those who are unacquainted to get to know one another on their own terms. I think that the thought of inviting a strangers into your personal space is pretty uncomfortable to many people. I also think people want to get out of their cave every now and then--especially with the rise of work-from-home.

I think the failure of traditional third spaces (cafes, bars, social clubs, libraries, etc.) has more to do with them being unable to adapt to the needs of modern society & socialization.

My thought is that there needs to be a new type of third space which meets those needs. Perhaps something like WeWork, but geared towards the third space? Something that can adapt to and support the diverse interest/hobbies/networks that have come about due to the internet. Something that tics all of the "Great Good Place" (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Third_place) boxes and more. I have some ideas, but need to develop them further.


https://www.reddit.com/r/astoria/comments/1hvw7m5/i_created_...

I agree that third spaces are very valuable but the reality is that they are declining in the current market and the trend doesn't seem to be changing any time soon. I think some venues will figure out how to make it work in the modern market but ultimately there will be fewer of these places in general.

And you're right about people being uncomfortable with strangers in their home but most people will meet in public first before having people over. This is a pattern I've seen a lot in NYC where a community will have public events to attract newcomers. Once these people are vetted, they are invited into a private Whatsapp or Discord. Once accepted into the private chat, people will organize private events which sometimes takes place at someone's home. In a way, my platform hopes to formalize this pattern and make it more accessible for individuals so it's less dependent on having formal organizers/hosts. This pattern still requires public spaces but I think it's a bit more flexible.


Hmm, what happens to the people that refuse to use WhatsApp/Discord ?


If that’s where the group is, you refuse to be part of that group. Nobody is going to inconvenience themselves for an outsider.

There is obviously variety is what tools groups use though.


A social crutch I really like is games. I’m terrible at talking to people, but I love playing competitive but social games. Stuff like chess boards, card games could go a long way.


I ran a company for 3 years working on this, let me know if you want to chat! I've moved on but I'm always happy to talk about solving this problem.


Yes definitely! How can I reach out to you?


devlin . bentley @ gmail.com or if you have xmpp devlinb@thawd.net

I'm also on discord as com2kid


The conversation around this topic usually goes to the lack of third spaces. Yes, it's true that this avenue of meeting people is declining and the cost of going out is increasing. I don't see any reason why this trend will change any time soon since the markets have decided that third spaces are not valuable.

I'm interested in thinking about how we can encourage social connection in a post third space society. I've been working on a project that helps people connect around hobbies in small groups of 4-5 people. The small size makes it easier for people to host at someone's place rather than requiring a public space. I think shared activities are a natural glue to have repeated consistent interactions which is key to building friendships.


Great question! This is definitely the hardest challenge for apps of this kind. There's a lot written out there on how to tackle the cold start problem.

My strategy is to focus locally first especially in NYC where I live. It's going to be a combination of running around in the city going to in person events and doing social media. If I can prove out the concept in one city, then I'll start focusing on other large metropolitan areas.


I've tried to building some variation of this app several times and it was always at the end that I realised growing it would be a nightmare.

I've had another idea that might hopefully get some traction once I can do an MVP. Hopefully someone solves it soon so I don't have to bother.


You're right about there being a lot of similar apps in this space. I think it's evident that the approaches tried so far haven't resonated with people in a meaningful way. And it's very possible my approach is wrong as well. With social apps, the smallest nuance in how it makes people feel can be the deciding factor for whether people use it or not.

I would love to hear more about the challenges you faced as you grew out your previous iterations.


Tbh I never bothered going to market. I couldn't see a way to monetise. They seemed to suffer several problems:

- Hyperlocal. Basically every few miles is a new market

- If there are no users, new users will search once and never return

- If they succeed and people make new friends, the app becomes redundant (so how to monetise)

- Meetup tried most monetisation options in the early days (eg sponsorship, venues paying, etc). They binned them all because they didn't work (there's a YT video about the founder talking about this if you can dig it out)

- In the same video the meetup guy said they started charging groups partly to cut spam

- You need active users but no spam

So there are multiple challenges. Iirc YC won't fund this kind of app probably because of these issues.

No easy answers really... if you have any I'll be all ears. A better meetup is definitely needed.

If I were to give any advice it would be not to code anything, but work with a business model canvas/value prop canvas until you can find an approach that solves these.

*Update* (Rate limited):

Yeah all those things rely on seeding it somehow and retention.

Anyway, good luck.


Yeah I'm not currently looking for YC funding. My goals for this probably don't align with that of YC. I would consider the project a success if I can provide value to people and monetize enough where I can support myself and a small team. If I can make the equivalent of a typical software dev role with this, I would be happy to work on this full time for the rest of my career.

As for making friends, I think new users never returning after initial success is thinking too short term. Throughout someone's life, there will be different needs for your social life. People move around or drift away from existing friends. Also, I want to be clear that this app is NOT a friend making app. It's an app to help you find people to do things with. This means if you want to explore a new hobby and none of the people you know do it, you can use this to build your own group to explore the hobby.

Also for retention, the long term goal for this project is to build a full social life platform. I think there are tools that can be built to help people maintain friendships after making them. The long term vision is for to be the one place you go to manage all parts of your real life social life (not social media). Right now I'm just tackling the portion of the problem that is most pressing which is discoverability.


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