So would you be against gay marriage if marriage didn't have the side-effect of favoring married couples over singles (or so you claim)?
If yes, then you would have to amend your reasons for being against gay marriage.
If no, then first you're not really against gay marriage, just against marriage in general. But by opposing just gay marriage you're being selective which is discrimination i.e. you want to deny gay couples the same rights that are given to non-gays. Whether you like those rights or not is irrelevant - they're already given and accepted by society.
Without the subsidies, marriage would be nothing but a default contract. So in that case, I'd favor making the contract more general and including gays.
Incidentally, gay marriage activists also favor discrimination against the single. I didn't want to start a fight pitting one unfavored group against another, the gay marriage activists did. Now that the fight is on, I'm obviously going to support my team. But I'd much rather join with gays and fight for fairness rather than against additional discrimination.
Ah. Have you talked to any outspoken pro-gay-marriage people, AKA activists? Like, all of the people in these threads who are telling you "yes, of course we're against marriage subsidies too, but pragmatically that has to be a future goal"?
You are not on a "team". You are making political statements (and probably actions, if you vote, canvass, or engage otherwise in the political process) that have real-life consequences for individuals with widely varying views.
"The Gay Marriage Activists" do not have weekly meetings that end with unanimous votes about how they hope the federal government supports tax cuts and special legal rights for married couples for ever and ever.
Maybe you just haven't quite explained it right yet, but I'm getting a strong fishy smell from what seems to be an argument that you'd "much rather join with gays and fight for fairness" -- except that you found out (somehow?) they all disagree with you on an issue that's, well, important but currently pretty irrelevant given widespread cultural norms.
If yes, then you would have to amend your reasons for being against gay marriage.
If no, then first you're not really against gay marriage, just against marriage in general. But by opposing just gay marriage you're being selective which is discrimination i.e. you want to deny gay couples the same rights that are given to non-gays. Whether you like those rights or not is irrelevant - they're already given and accepted by society.